..My World..

Hermit crab

2010-02-02T00:28:00.000-08:00

I kinda hate my life now..
stressed and tired..
i want to give up alot of times..
but then many thing stopped me to do so..

being looked down by everyone..
and have to stay cheerful and carefree..
aint something easy to do..
Especially when u had nothing to hold..

being rude and rough..
it wasnt me..
it was to protect my pride..
and my soul..

I wanted to defend..
but im not good at it..
being stabbed and slashed..
I'm bleeding from inside rather then out..

Time passes by..
and i got used to the pain..
which drive a person go nuts..
but i develop the toughest shield..

building the shield was a painful process..
to endure and stay calm..
to anyone who looked down and decived..
tears of sorrow drip by drip..

shields are done, blade is not..
the forging of it was tougher than creating a shield..
though it was created by rudeness and oppsing heart..
my blade was blunt..

Im like a hermit crab..
stealing shells to change identity and personality..
using shell as a defensive shield..
and pincer of blunt blades..

like a hermit crab..
Im just trying to protect..
myself, my soul..
and what I cherished most..

28-June-2009

2009-06-28T08:47:00.000-07:00

wuut~!

9 more days~

to 1 year aniversary~

happi~

hope i can do smt really can impress Raven~

but i think i'll have to keep it next year><

haiz our aniversary falls on exam weeks...

but anyway, happi to have 1yr aniversary soon~

looking forward to 7/7/2009~!!

________________________________________________

T'day~

i did smt really worthy to do it~

i walk from Pelangi Plaza to Stulang laut~

wuut it took me 45 min to reach my bio tuition place ==!

but it was fun~

alone walking at path that i used to ride on cars and taxi~

it was a new experience~

everything slows down~

i sees everything that i nvr get to see bfr~!

soon i reach stulang~

i brought a corn~

LOL~ guess wat!

it took me 1 hr+ to fin it ==!

lol!

evrything was soo nice~

i smelt, touched and tasted things i've nvr tried bfr~

i saw sunsets, people walking hand in hand along the beaches~

it was kinda romantic~

people seems to hav no stress at all~

_____________________________________________________

thn things struck my mind~

and i start asking myself, why am i struggling in all my studies?

y my parents is pushing me?

thn i set along the beach and ate my corn~

thinking~

lol

kinda private the answer~XD

sry, cant say~

_____________________________________________________

•◘•♂Eryx♀•◘•

2009-06-26T05:19:00.000-07:00

~Sweet~

14-Feb-09

Waited for that day so long,

and it has finally come~

Prepared for atleast 2 weeks

just for that day,

but there is a little bit mess up.

1st time celebrated valentine,

damn nervous,

but then all the nervous went off when i reached school,

bouquet of flowers-check,

basket of chocolate and a dog plushie-check,

and a little present- not checked =.=ll,

I was soo forgetful back then..

My love-one arrived,

then i walkout from the room,

and 'Raven!'

she looked at me,

using sign language I asked her come over a minute~

when she reached,

Hualaaa~ POP out the 1st thing,

the flower,

omg == I thought she would said,

'Huh? a bush of flower?'

but hmm, she reacted the other way,

'The flowers are beautiful~'

when I heard that I was,

OMG! she said it was beautiful?

did I heard wrongly?

before I could ever ask her

'Did i heard wrongly??'

she hugged me

then i forgotten what i was wanting to say~ LOL!

Then showed her the basket of chocolate,

she looked at the basket O.O~

I actually wanted to laugh, but she hold me tighter

Then I cant even move =.=

As the time goes by,

1pm,

me and nerd2 (wong), get changed and ready to go to cs,

When I reached there,

1st thing I did was,

RUSH TO THE SHOPS!!

and spend bout 30 min to choose the little surprise

after getting it, then waited for my lovely girl

Soon she reached, and I went to met her

I'm not sure whether she was surprised or hav already noticed..

anyway all the surprise that i've planned have workout,

not sure whether is a success or a failure lol!

anyway,

1st time celebrated St. Valentine's Day,

Felt very very happy,

Lol!

_________________________________________________________

To: Gim Eam

Hmm I didnt give you anything made outta my hand, nor express my feeling out on a card to you. Hmm i was thinkin and paning for the day, till i really forgotten the true meaning of Valentine's day. A day where I express my feeling, but i did not.
My dear, I am really thankful, no much better than thankful, for giving me the chance. Without that little chance you gave me, I wouldnt have met you or even understand you more than i know you today.
When you gave me the chance, I am totally in paradise, in heaven. Nothing could be better than your acceptance. You gave me the Chance, I cherish it very very dearly to me. I put you before anyone and everyone, you are the onli one I dear so much in my life till now.
I could say nothing else, just very very grateful and thankful that you gave me the chance that i wish to perform it perfectly.
I not sure whether did i not did a good job?
I wish that i could be there for you when you are down, I wish that i could do something to bring a little change in your life, I wish that Icould be a part of your life, I wish that you could face the world with your smile. I wished and i wished, but dunno which one i've done it correctly.
For one thing I wished the most, I want you to be happy always. This would be my last year in this school, we would not be able to see each other this frequently as now we are, I could not be by yourside till then. I feared alot of thing, worry.
For all I know now, is to love you even more than ever. I dont wish that I could have a after life, for what I am aiming, I would have atone alot of sins. Would I have a afterlife or just, my soul disappear and vanish into somewhere or nowhere, i dont know.
Soo my dear, I wish that you would a very happy life, cause for me you are perfect, just too perfect I could not wish for more from you~ For now and always~
Thank you~^^ I love you always~

•••♂Eryx♀•••